One of my smoking buddies has been promoted to possibly soon-to-be-dating. We’ve had the longest virtual somewhat long distance exchange in forever. He was in a pretty rough shape with his ex still living at his place, him being either depressed or upset most of the times etc. So I just was there chatting and encouraging.
Whenever he was in a lighter mood, we flirted. Also, he has an amazing sense of humour. It’s dry, sarcastic and most of the time I have a hard time telling if he’s joking at all.
Other great things about him are – he is clearly interested in me (yay! That’s the first) – and has demonstrated a steady interest for I don’t know how many months – we slowly progressed from occasional messaging and meeting in the smoking area to regular calls, then we hugged, today we kissed. It’s such a slow pace where no one is trying to push forward or rush that I am amazed – it flows naturally.
He’s a family guy to the bone – loves and adores his kids (the oldest isn’t his biologically, yet he raised her since she was two), his mom and grandfather.
He has his own place – albeit in a different city an hour or so away from mine.
He is very sweet and romantic and great with words.
At one point I told him straight out that as long as his ex still lives under the same roof, what goes on between us will stay where it was – calls and chats in smoking area. He was pretty impressed with my boldness – well, I am straightforward generally, and at that point I had some wine too. (Not to gain bravery or anything, just to relax after yet another crazy day at work).
She moved out about a month ago – things have gained momentum ever since – and yet he always stays respectful and can tell where the boundary is – unlike so many guys I’ve dated who are totally on their own agenda and press it pretty hard. Or otherwise wait for you to take initiative. Yeah, right – I’m the driver, thanks, no.
In short, I am cautiously optimistic (I think I’ve used this expression before few times) – this time around I am warming up to the guy, not feel repulsed by him nor chase someone with a lukewarm interest for me…
PS He, like G. is another Irish G. I work with. But that’s about all similarities that there are to it.