So last night he messaged me to drive safely and replied to my report of safe arrival home. And then nufin. The old me would be freaking out, guessing whether that was another game or if he was expecting me to start messaging or whatnot. He also didn’t call. Again, would have had given me lots of sorrow before.
Now I just dismissed it with a whatever – he either fell asleep (which he later on claimed was the case), or else he’s still digesting my message, or he’s playing some silly game – I don’t give a shit anymore. I mean, I do and I don’t. I am not overthinking anymore. It’s way easier this way.
And if he is a total loner, then I’ll leave him alone. My deadline of end of February still holds for now, but now it’s not just some line in the sand that I am scared of, it’s a solid wall that has ‘self-respect’ and ‘don’t waste your time’ written all over it. Just one of those doors I need to shut to be able to move on with my life – if nothing changes, the room is too small and there’s not enough air in it for me.